So it’s been a little while since Life of an Architect has checked in with Cultural Prodigy and now titanic 1st grader Kate Borson. Despite her hectic schedule, due to a prior relationship with her handler, Life of an Architect was able to get onto her schedule for this interview. Kate was gracious enough to sit down with me for 10 minutes the other day and discuss Santa Claus and the magic of Christmas.
(When I arrive at “The Den”, Kate was sitting on a couch looking casual in brown shorts and a brown camisole top resplendent with butterflies …despite the temperature being a cool 40 degrees outside. This girl is too cool)
LoaA: Hi Kate, thanks for sitting down with me today to discuss Santa Claus. What do you think of Santa Claus?
Kate: He’s awesome! He brings you presents!!
LoaA: Where does Santa Claus live?
Kate: At the North Pole – how can someone not know this?
LoaA: What does Santa Claus live in, like a cave or a house … what?
Kate: He doesn’t live in a cave! [very matter of factly] He lives in a castle … with a tower.
LoaA: How did it get built? Is there a building supply store nearby?
Kate: I don’t know, it just got built – they built it. Santa didn’t … he’s too old so the elves must have built the castle.
LoaA: What did Santa do while the elves were building the castle?
Kate: He told the elves what to do and once it was built, it was finished and then they started on the reindeer shack.
LoaA: So Santa is like an architect and the elves are like contractors?
Kate: Yes – that’s right.
LoaA: Is the castle one building or are there several buildings?
Kate: There is just the one building with the reindeer shack next door.
LoaA: So is there a toy shop?
Kate: Its a two story building. In the upper story, that’s where Mrs. Claus and Mr. Claus – Santa – they live on top and in the down story is where the elves are.
LoaA: Where do the toys get built?
Kate: In the down story where the elves live and all the toys get put on a shelf. In the middle of this room is full of beds, like towers of beds – I don’t know what they’re called.
LoaA: So all the elves live in the same room?
Kate: Yes. They are all brothers and sisters so they never ever marry. Never ever.
LoaA: Do the elves have a Mom and Dad?
Kate: No. Mrs. Claus and Santa Claus are their parents.
LoaA: So when Santa Claus and Mrs Claus have babies, Mrs. Claus has elf babies?
Kate: Nooooo … she takes care of them, she feeds them, and tells them what to make.
LoaA: Mrs. Claus tells them what to make? I thought Santa told the elves what to make?
Kate: That is when they’re in the castle.
LoaA: Okay. What type of food do the elves eat?
Kate: Christmas food. They have candy canes for desert.
LoaA: What about vegetables?
Kate: There is no such thing as vegetables at the North Pole, they only eat candy canes from the candy cane mines.
LoaA: There are candy cane mines?
Kate: Yes. They eat cookies and for desert they eat candy canes because they have a peppermint mine.
LoaA: Do they get big and fat?
Kate: No they drink milk with the cookies so they don’t get fat. They don’t get fat because they are magic.
LoaA: Do the elves ever get to go on vacation?
Kate: No. Vacation for them is the North Pole, they love it there so much.
LoaA: Who takes care of the reindeers?
Kate: They don’t get to run around wild but Mrs. Claus and Santa feed them breakfast, lunch and dinner. Sometimes an elf will do it.
LoaA: Do you think there are directions on where to find the North Pole?
Kate: The people know where it is…
LoaA: The people? Which people?
Kate: You have to be kidding me! All kinds of people – everyone knows where to find the North Pole.
LoaA: So if you go to the North Pole you can find Santa?
Kate: No, no, no, no, no, no! If you go looking for Santa you won’t get any presents.
LoaA: So you can find the North Pole – you just can’t find Santa’s workshop. Is that right?
Kate: Right. The North Pole is on the map, Santa’s workshop is deep, deep up in there.
LoaA: Is the workshop just sitting out there in the snow? Or is it in a mountain or underground??
Kate: It’s deep in there but it’s behind like a mountain of snow. Like a tremendous pile of snow that froze. You can’t find Santa Claus but you can find the North Pole.
LoaA: Does Santa wear his red suit every day or does he have other clothes?
Kate: He just has clothes.
LoaA: Like what I’m wearing?
Kate: No, [eye-balling me, giving me the once over] that’s not his style.
LoaA: What kind of style does Santa have?
Kate: He wears red shirts and jeans and his black boots.
LoaA: Sounds like Santa is dressed to ride a motorcycle.
Kate: [very seriously] Santa does not ride a motorcycle.
LoaA: Does Santa ever get to leave the North Pole to get supplies, you know, to build the toys?
Kate: No, he can use magic to get what he needs.
LoaA: Have you been a good girl? Is Santa going to find you?
Kate: Yes, and Santa can find everyone. I hope you people have a Merry Christmas and don’t get coal in your stocking.
LoaA: You people? Who are you talking to?
Kate: I’m talking to the people that are on your phone.
LoaA: There isn’t anyone on my phone.
Kate: I am talking to the people who read my blog.
LoaA: Of I see – you are hamming it up for the people on the blog? Trying to make it entertaining?
Kate: Oh yes, yes, yes. YESSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
LoaA: But they can’t hear you. I think we should wrap this up.
Kate: Big finish! [strikes very kung-fu like pose]
I’d like to thank Kate once again for being such a good sport and taking time to chat with me today about Santa Claus. She also is well aware that this interview is going upon the site www.lifeofanarchitect.com – she’s a big fan. If you want to see the first interview with Kate, the one that got it all started, you can find it here.